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Oatmeal_in_a_Bowl
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Name: Becca Y.
Country: Congo
Gender: Female
Interests: Oh, sometimes i like lots of things. adventures and friends are good things.
and family.
i like watching the earth worms come up after a light rain...and petting fish is exciting.
Peace and Love are wonderful things
Expertise: I guess seeing people. seeing into them even if they don't know it. and i like to think. and smile. and make peace.
Occupation: Manufacturing/production
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
4/22/2006
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| I like the smell of fresh rain, i do.
it meshes so well with that large unintented strawberry stain on my pants, and the tahina sauce that dripped down the front of my shirt.
Today i felt like i was in a contented pool of summer. Little things throughout the day to energize me, but for the most part it was as relaxed as can be. Life seems so mellow and enjoyable.
I woke up to birds singing.
and i rode down Lincoln Hwy with a viola awkwardly strapped to the back of my recumbent.
and then went about picking strawberry's.
and i wrote a song, which turned out quite nice.
and then i showed my brother how to make a strawberry milkshake, which turned out quite milky but the sugar made it good anyway.
and i read a book about a girl with such a different life, but so many of the same thoughts.
and i thought about peoples...
It's interesting, all these graduation parties. They've been so very enjoyable and i've loved them each. and i think i'm starting to grasp what they actually mean. the graduates can finally go live more now and explore outside of home. and for the peoples still here, well, now there's room to grow.
I guess i will miss them, yes, i think i will really miss them. but i'll be delighted when i see them different times. all the same, it just seems like a part of life that continues on.
Being an only child will be quite different. I've always known life to be a whirlwind of having older ones to follow around and watch grow. It'll be differnt, maybe a good differnt.
It feels like i can sense the world pulling me more each day. and i love the idea of answering it back. what for, i don't know exactly, does anyone know? i guess i probably can't be the person i want to be, or am, alone though.
It's good to have a little help from my friends.
Becca Yoder
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| I've found myself again.
It's a good feeling.
I don't know what else to say....
maybe i'll just stop
here.
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| Right now, just this moment, maybe not the moment you read
this, but oh just at this moment, I’m by myself.
Yes, just me.
Here in the house, no noise about me, no music, no talking,
Uggh the phone just rang, wait here, I’ll be back…
Josh called, he’s alive. I told him I’m making homemade pizza,
he decided he’ll come home after all.
Anyway, I think I like being alone, in a house that’s quiet.
Sometimes I think of where I might live if I’m living when I am old enough to
live alone…I actually really like being individual. I don’t think I’d mind living alone in a
small house. Just as long as people come at all hours for tea and comfort.
I love this feeling of aloneness. After a busy week it’s
just what I need.
I can snatch that last piece of Brandywine
chocolate from the freezer, which I probably should save for someone else, but
oh well, they’re not here to claim it.
I can sing at top of my voice, with no care about who’s
listening. Only me.
and oh the best part, I can write truly from myself. No need
to keep revising and revising as people walk by and peek over my shoulder…
All the things one can do when they have a house all to
themselves. I’m actually a little afraid of the freedom…I might be tempted to…I
don’t know…do something I’ve never done before…maybe I shouldn’t be afraid.
Becca Yoder | | |
| Well, i usually don't write so very often. But it's a good snow day. With plenty of spare time to write, and think and write more.
I feel as if i should think up some extravigant thoughts to type...but then i would feel almost inhuman if i had to write so extravigantly all the time.
I have a pile of orange peels sitting in front of me.
Lately i've taken to wandering the streets. It has become a process. I start out, kind of edgy. Not quite myself. Feeling as though i know i'll become myself sooner or later, but not quite sure how to get there.
Walking in the dark or early morning is my favorite. There arn't so many cars or people about to bring me back to reality.
Sometimes i think about writing a book. Yes, you're right, it would be a lot of ramblings and such, but who knows it might get somewhere. It might actually get me somewhere.
The pile of orange peels sitting in front of me smells so very delicious..
Someday.
i want to find a set of plates. The kind with beautiful designs on
them. And then i'd find a big smooth rock. and i stand there, and one
by one i'd throw the plates at the rock, and just watch them shatter
into perfect little peices...and then, oh yes, i'd collect the peices
and make large murals out of them. Won't you come join me?
My family is calling me to go to Salvation army...
Yes, alright i think i will end this. It's been fun actually. I think writing randomness is my favorite.
Hopefully it's made you feel like you're not the only strange being on this earth.
Well, I should go put my orange peels in the scrap bucket..
tata
B.Y.
:)
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| Oh xanga, You win. I've sat long enough stareing back at you, blowing my nose, and smearing chapstick on my sore nose, and i think it's time i give in a write a bit.
I've realized people change each day... Have you noticed? Yes indeed, one day we are young, boistrous free of lifes worries. and oh then we learn...
But what a good learning. People around me are changing. And i'm learning from them. I learn to see into them. and understand them.
It's freeing, I think. To see the ones I admire, grow up, and struggle with their own decisions. They're changing.
I learn to understand my own self. A couple of years ago i would have sat through a learning about India, and not really felt it.
But now i've learned. Learned to see more deeply.
It's contentful, i think. Oh yes, contentful to smile right back at a photograph of another girl. My age, a different life, different situation, And understand her, knowing she'd do the same for me.
It's contentful to feel the familiar tug of wanting to live and eat beside those outcast from thier own societies. Wanting to take their hands in yours and accept them as they are.
I'm starting to like this changing. Oh maybe it's just in myself that i find it, and now i notice it in others too.
I love to watch and see into those around me. Some of us have tears and others anger at those who we think hinder us from fullfuilling our dreams.
and now i'll pat your knee, smile and say, "Oh how right you are."
Even if we both don't know what your right about.
I wonder if people ever truly find themselves. There's always something new or unexpected within to explore.
I like changes i do.
I wonder why we continuosly hide from them?
I am finding that i do this quite often.
Maybe it is because we are afraid of... i don't know what....losing ourselves?
Oh maybe and maybe not. It's hard until one accepts changing and then it's like jumping into a muddy puddle with white pants on.
Fullfilling to its best :)
B.Y.
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